Life in Øksfjord, a small village of 600 people in Northern Norway... Meet Simon, a newcomer to this hidden paradise, whose name is unfortunately pronounced in these parts as sounding less like "lime on" and more like "tea men". Follow his dreams and snigger at his downfalls... Also take a retrospective look at project 2012, a diary with a difference...... January 1 was a description of one word, January 2 contained two words and so on until NYE 2012....Well almost.
Tuesday, 31 July 2012
Day:213, Words:213
We set off at 10.30 and I tried to remember the correct path to start on. At about the 200 metre mark, we started to sweat and the insects invaded. Flies, mosquitoes and a bunch of other unidentified annoying animals surrounded our heads, occassionally darting in and out of ears, noses and mouths.
After a good 2 hours, we could see the top and skipped towards the rocky tower with new energy. We scribbled down our names in the scruffy exercise book and sat there inhaling the 360 degree views.
The trip down was less than enjoyable. The fields of loose rocks on the steep decline caused multiple falls and the occassional mini avalanche. After an hour and a half of knee shaking pain, we were on flat land and boasting of our accomplishments.
Monday, 30 July 2012
Day:212, Words:212
Now there is talk amongst the Tour de France organisers to look at a shorter tour of Northern Norway. The scenery is spectacular along the coast and the undulating roads and challenging mountain passes seem an ideal set up for the big names of cycling to tackle.
The less than flattering media coverage for the 'Coop' supermarket in Øksfjord appears to have made a positive impact. Whether it was harsh words from high management or something else, the store has never looked so full and organised. A quick check in the milk and yoghurt shelves confirmed that there was a full range of goods, all within the use by dates.
After purchasing a lotto ticket in nearby Burfjord, a family man in his 40s from Kautokeino celebrated quietly after pocketing a satisfying 11.7 million kroner.
Sunday, 29 July 2012
Day:211, Words:211
Back in Northern Norway, the family, enjoying their mini break at the summer farm, jumped into an old wooden boat, equipped with a new motor for a casual spot of fishing. Fishing in Northern Norway is extremely satisfying for those who don't enjoy five hour trips with a couple of nibbles. Bait is unheard of as fish of all shapes and sizes appear to jump onto a hook time after time. It was a session of catch and release as the kids were more interested in the thrill of the catch than the filleting, cooking and eating.
Saturday, 28 July 2012
Day:210, Words:210
One of the concerns was the ongoing existence of out of date goods, including milk and yoghurt. Other complaints referred to rotten fruit and the absence of everyday necessities. According to one pensioner, the store cannot be trusted to stock what is needed for important occassions such as birthdays, dinner parties, christenings and confirmations. It appears more and more are taking their shopping elsewhere, travelling two hours to Alta and spending thousands of kroner, denying the local community of much needed funds.
Unfortunateley, while the boss is away, it is the mostly inexperienced staff who have had to deal with both the summer rush and the complaints that comes from the frustrated and unsatisfied customers.
Remember to check the dates on your milk!
Friday, 27 July 2012
Day:209, Words:209
Apparently optimism sells as all of the major newspapers are teasing with bright suns on the front page under similar headings of a 'promised' late summer. The fact is that, this may be one of those rare, yet totally plausible situations when the days were ticked off and the summer never came.
The sheep have escaped once again and are on the loose up one mountain or another. They have escaped before and it took two solid days to walk them back to their grassy paddock.
The evening was a blur of good wine and competitive board games. No mattter how old one becomes, the enjoyment of sitting in a holiday house with a large group of people is a wonderful thing.
Thursday, 26 July 2012
Day:208, Words:208. (guest writer Mats Patterson)
I woke up at 9 am and after my shower, I styled my hair with spikes and a touch of red hairspray. I had cheerios for breakfast and watched kids tv. We have both Cartoon Network and Disney XD. I helped pack as today we were going to Hamneidet, the summer cottage that belongs to my grandfather.
After packing, I took my cute little brother and jumped on the trampoline. He loves to play with me on the trampoline. We play a kind of 'tag' by running around like crazy in circles, bouncing and falling over.
When we were finished playing, my brother and I took our beloved beagle, Baron , for a walk to the lake. We went inside to have lunch and we were then on our way.
Finally we made it to kid heaven, 'Hamneidet'. We jumped on one of the two trampolines but were fighting with my brother and his cousin over the best and biggest trampoline.
We played heaps of football but I shot the ball over the goal and the ball landed in a bunch of high grass that burns your bare skin. I covered my arms but it is possible I will be itchy tomorrow.
Wednesday, 25 July 2012
Day:207, Words:207
Still on the topic of the current, less than satisfactory, summer conditions, the upcoming cloudberry season may be ruined due to cold temperatures and rain. These little orange clumps of delight, are heavily sought after and a range of Autumn recipes rely on their abundance. The maturation process of the cloudberries are at least two weeks late, according to local berry experts. They report that although there will be enough to satisfy the Christmas Eve dessert requirements, it appears there won't be much left over to store in the freezer.
With all this rain and wind, the Øksfjord landscape has taken on a very Irish look. The lush grass and the fast growing trees makes for a green scene. Moss is crawling over the mountain, and the waterfalls and rivers are flowing as quickly as ever. The kids seem to be undeterred by the wet conditions as they camp in their backyard tents, ride their bikes and bounce on their soggy trampolines.
Tuesday, 24 July 2012
Day:206, Words:206
Last weekend, the town hall played host to an Øksfjord reunion. The event was a celebration of the musical talents that have come out of the village over the past 40 years. Former high school bands, internationally known artists and current starlets from Øksjord came together to reminisce and jam. The night was a brilliant success and proof that small towns provide more than its fair share of cultural talent. However, it was a non musical element that proved to be the highlight of the evening. A creative gentleman used the drawing of the raffle to propose on stage to his blushing, unsuspecting girlfriend in front of 150 cheering guests.
Naturally, she said yes!
Monday, 23 July 2012
Day:205, Words:205
The neighbours, being mostly pensioners are ever present, and when chatting about the weather over the past three weeks, their response is not ambiguous. It's been Crappy!
After success at last year's Øksfjord festival, the local cafe/ bar 'Dattera til Larson' has reopened. Despite the cooler than anticipated conditions, the summerly establishment has been well frequented.
Otherwise life goes on as tourists continue to be bussed in, fish themselves to exhaustion and return, hopefully to spread the good word.
At the general store, the new edition of 'Øksfjord News' is practically jumping off the shelves.
Sunday, 22 July 2012
Day:204, Words:204
There was a certain feeling of apprehension as we drove passed our cellar door. Prior to leaving for our holidays, we had consulted the local 'AKSIS' a business that provides work for people who find it hard to find other employment for a number of reasons.
The Øksfjord department has provided many locals with handmade furniture, book shelves and picture frames and we had requested a dog door to be installed in our cellar door. In typical Finnmark fashion, we left for our holiday without a celler door but with an assurance that it would be done within a day or two. A day or two can sometimes translate to four months up here, so were plesantly suprised to find a magnificent cellar door complete with installed beagle entrance.
Saturday, 21 July 2012
Day:203, Words:203
Saturday dinner was at the prize winning Bios restaurant. Voted best in Norway for 2 years running, the eatery hosts thousands of international tourists during summer and locals all year round.The big boys enjoyed Saturday snacks, coke and films in the cosy caravan, before tired heads finally hit the pillow at 1 am.
Meanwhile as the charter season hits full swing, an over enthusiastic man, who boarded in Tromsø on his way to the Canary Islands, was forced to leave the plane at a stop over in Oslo following an over indulgence of pre holiday beverages. The incident is not uncommon and many make good use of the bar situated next to the boarding gate.
Friday, 20 July 2012
Day:202, Words:202
Despite the murky conditions, a group of under 10s are in kid heaven in Hamneidet, a few hours drive south of Øksfjord. The spacious family property is the scene of a range of fun including trampolines, a mini size football pitch and a play loft. A swimming pool is able to be used with the aid of wetsuits and a wood heated hot tub comes in handy during the recent run of atrocious weather.
The property also doubles as a mini zoo, with horses, sheep and a wild rabbit, who takes pleasure in teasing the family beagle. To complete the country club like setup, the kids have access to numerous mini motorized vehicles, kayaks and a boat. When they have totally exhausted themselves, they can retire to their own private caravan.It's just like being a kid in the 1950 s. Who needs playstation!
Thursday, 19 July 2012
Day:201, Words:201: Øksfjordians on holiday
The family left the world's smallest room in central Copenhagen and explored the highlights before the afternoon flights. The cooler climate was welcoming and there were few complaints about the overcast, drizzly conditions. Lunch was enjoyed at the Irish owned Irish bar.
Copenhagen really is a people watching kind of town. There are all types strolling through one of the world's longest walking streets or cycling on the cleverly constructed bike lanes throughout the friendly city.
Despite the large July crowds, the atmosphere was relaxed as the masses sat in the open squares, enjoying a Carlsberg or a quality Danish ice cream.
Even the super touristy Ripleys and Guiness museums were not as pushy as they are in other cities. It was a pleasant end to the holiday before the final trek to Oslo and then Tromsø.
The very long day actually moved into tomorrow, following a three and a half hour drive north. Despite the midnight sun, the gloomy weather cast a dark shadow over the fjords. Two days in Hamneidet and back to Øksfjord reality where hopefully an Indian summer awaits...
Wednesday, 18 July 2012
Day:200, Words:200: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The day was a blur of transfer lounge couch surfing, pretzel consuming purgatoty as the change in flight schedules meant a 6 hour wait in Dusseldorf, the epitome of mediocre airport existence. The passport control men looked particulary grumpy as they studied and interrogated those standing before us in the queue. When our turn came to cross the red line, the scary man smiled kindly and waved us through in an instant.
After 16 hours of waiting with some plane travel sqeezed in between, the exhausted family reached Copenhagen once again. A short train ride and a stroll down the bicycle scattered road and we were confronted again by the dreaded code/corridoor maze before finally gaining entry to our haven for the night.
I believe not even the old woman who lived in the shoe would have considered a straight swap of dwellings!
Tuesday, 17 July 2012
Day:199, Words:199: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The evening program at the Melissa Garden Hotel consisted of Bingo and Karaoke. As it was our last night, the staff had decorated the table with flowers and an odd yet beautiful display of napkin and glass art. The guests were confused about the rules of the Turkish Bingo and the Scottish contingent repeated the numbers with their own pronunciation. The highlight however was witnessing a suprised lass being deposited into the pool for not following the correct procedure.
As there was packing to be done and a ridiculous early start, the Øksfjordians said goodbye to the wonderful staff and let them get on with the night.
Thanks Turkey for your warmth!!
Monday, 16 July 2012
Day:198, Words:198: Øksfjordians on holiday!
For a few hours, there was no need to harrass the families strolling by. It appears that word of mouth had worked wonders for the reputation of this restaurant in the extremely competeitive market of tourism and food. Several Øksfjordians before us had recommended 'Aphrodite' and other Norwegians couples staying at the Melissa Garden hotel had successfully dined there earlier in the week. It was not strange therefore that the vast majority of the customers seemed to be from the land of the midnight sun.
Being our last night in the old town, we decided to give it a shot. The food was delicious, the wine was blissfully chilled and the dessert was richer than the Sultan of Brunei.
Earlier, the day had been spent watching Norwegian kids playing with but struggling to understand Scottish kids, and listening to British divorcees discuss how far they had come in 'Fifty shades of Grey'.
Sunday, 15 July 2012
Day:197, Words:197: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The T-shirt salesmen are equally ambitious. Staring curiously at your football shirt or shorts that had been purchased earlier in the day from another vendor, they seem intent on selling the exact same product, only cheaper. " Hello Ronaldo, we have Ronaldo shirts here. How much did you pay...much cheaper here....good quality....made in Ukraine..."
Of course it is all part of the adventure. Tomorrow, I intend to wear a Pakistan cricket shirt and claim that I am from the Cook Islands..
Saturday, 14 July 2012
Day:196, Words:196: Øksfjordians on holiday!
Another theme that needs to be visited is children control and what is considered to be appropriate action. Rule 45a clearly states that adults who choose to either set up camp beside the baby pool, or even bathe in it, rescind their rights to complain about splashing, jumping and other childish activities.
Although the usual commands of 'Don't Run' or 'Put down that cat' are commonly heard, one loud parent has raised eyebrows with her constant berating, yelling and public humiliation of her daughters, despite a seemingly lack of mischief on their part.
Friday, 13 July 2012
Day:195, Words:195: Øksfjordians on holiday!
We arrived at 7pm as the large hot orange sun was starting to sink towards the horizon. The restaurant was positioned on the end of a long pier and had a spectacular view of the mediterranean, the quaint part of the old town and the quiet surrounding beaches. It seemed an eternity away from the noise and aggressive sales tactics on the main drag.
After dinner, several Northern Norwegian families retired to the private sandy beach in the 'drinks and dessert' area and sat blissfully on the scattered coloured beanbags, sipping icy coctails and watching silhouetted kids play in the shallows.Thanks for the tip Alex!
Thursday, 12 July 2012
Day:194, Words:194: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The other suprising element was the lack of turtle action, considering that, along with the waterfall, turtle watching, was one of the selling points for the tour! Nevertherless, the freshly prepare lunch and the swim in the middle of the Mediterranean was a highlight. Pleasant suprises came in the evening. The 7 piece dance troupe was so talented, they seemed more suited to a concert hall in Instanbul or London, than a cosy 3 star resort. The belly dancer was equally impressive with her rythmic pulsations captivating spectators both young and old. If that wasn't enough, the diligent staff performed a breathing and juggling exhibition. What a wonderfully varied place!
Wednesday, 11 July 2012
Day:193, Words:193: Øksfjordians on holiday!
After hours spent throwing young bikini clad girls into he pool, the young gentlemen were a model of proffesionalism, providing excellent food and wine service with cheeky smiles, despite having been on their feet for 14 hours.
Like all new places, it takes a few days to learn the house rules. The daily ritual of travelling on the highly stressful, yet also exhilerating 'dolmus' bus, which translated means 'stuffed ' has its own set of bizzare procedures. The fare appears to change each day, making it difficult for passengers to hand correct change to the driver/ cashier, while the dolmus is travelling at high speeds through the mayhem.
As the dolmus comes to a screeching stop, the driver aggressively waves the bewildered passengers off the vehicle, who must walk the remainder of the trip.
Tuesday, 10 July 2012
Day:192, Words:192: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The energetic staff, mostly young men in their early 20s, flirt with the girls all day long, chase the young kids, push each other into the pool, yet still find time to offer first class food and drink service with a smile.
Monday, 9 July 2012
Day:191,Words:191: Øksfjordians on holiday!
As the Øksfjordian family shuffled once again through the dusty Roman ruins in search of a refreshing drink and a bite to eat, the gaze drifted from the oncoming bustling Turkish motorists to the digital clock outside of a hotel. 50 degrees read the digital sign! No wonder we were sweating like the proverbials. A certain sense of pride and achievement was felt by the Øksfjordians as they collapsed at the first available shady restaurant.
Meanwhile, back home in Øksfjord, the complaints are of a different nature. Disgrunted, home holidayers, have finally lost patience and vented their anger on the social networking scene. The old wives tales and various weather rules have been proven to be as correct as the previous four doomsday predictions. A 40 degree differential between Turkey and Øksfjord is not to be scoffed at. Yet again....as the motto reads....we know where we live!
Sunday, 8 July 2012
Day:190, Words:190: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The charter tour is enjoyed by some and loathed by others.The Scandinavians like to put their well earned kroner to good use and invest their trust in one of many tour companies that ensure that nothing is like it as home, meaning cheap drinks, continous hot days and endless sandy beaches. The option is also there for the all incluive package which means that as many drinks, food and ice cream can be consumed as humanly possible.
During some chater flights, the fun begins with drinks being served at the gate, followed by some more beverage service on the plane and concluding with a raucous applause as it lands at the sunny destination.
Saturday, 7 July 2012
Day:189, Words:189: Øksfordians on holiday!
Here in southern Turkey, there appears to be some sort of an identity crisis when it comes to currency. The euro is not only accepted, but preferred in many places to the Turkish lira. In a country that crosses the European Asian border the western European influence shouts loudest in the tourist strips. The Turkish culture can suprisingly be difficult to locate. The majority of restaurant owners seem convinced that everyone prefers garlic bread and cafe lattes, when really most would more appreciate Turkish bread, kebabs and a strong Turkish coffee.
Otherwise it is a case of pool living at its best. The Nordic tourists are satisfied with the warmth and outdoor swimming opportunities, the relative affordability of coktails and the possibilty of sitting outside after sundown without the need to rug up in front of a bonfire.
Friday, 6 July 2012
Day:188, Words:188, Øksfjordians on holiday!
Today thousands of tourists step over these centuries old remants daily as if they were inconvenient road works blocking the path.
There must be about 35,000 bars and restaurants lining the old streets and each of them employs a sales ninja, who is highly trained in the arts of closing the deal.
The well dressed employee will run through the advantages recieved by dining at this particular restaurant. A cheap kids menu, only 7 Turkish lira, a kids playground in the middle of the fine dining area, the best food in the entire universe, no service charge like all the other restaurants have ( they all say this) and the best seat in the restaurant ( mostly due to the lack of customers).
This procedure is repeated every 10 metres until you find yourself staring at awe at the remains of the Apollo temple, bathed in sun setting rays, leaning up against the tranquill Mediterranean.
Thursday, 5 July 2012
Day:187, Words:187: Øksfjordians on holiday!
The Øksfjordians were relieved to discover their room was larger than a postage stamp and enjoyed their first day, despite the oppressive heat. The kids receive extra kind treatment from the kind locals, who are constantly offering turkish delights and shoulder rides.
Back on the issue of Turkish transport, the procedure to follow when catching the local shuttle bus is as follows..Do not wait at the bus stop. The bus will not stop there. Simply raise your hand and the bus will stop dead where you stand, regardless of the approaching traffic. In an act resembling a dangerous circus juggling act, the driver will shout a random amount of somewhere between 3 and 12 lira, take your money and deliver back the change one handed, while constantly beeping the horn with the other hand.
More adventures to come...
Wednesday, 4 July 2012
Day:186, Words:186
Today the destination was Side in Turkey. It began with a dawn escape of fort knox, with a convoy of baggage and prams. Copenhagen lufthavn is just a refreshing hop, skip and a jump away from the central train station and one of the most inexpensive journeys from a major city to an airport going around.
Reports from Øksfjord are quite normal for the beginning of July. The heat starved locals are waiting patiently for the short summer to finally begin. Some believe it is just around the corner, others are more pessimestic.
We chose to travel south.
One of the curious oddities when arriving in Turkey is the the compulsory purchase of a sticker to slap in the back of the passport. The cost of this'visa' depends upon the colour of your passport. While the Norwegians escape with a 15 euro purchase, the Australians will have to fork out three times as much. Curiously, the sticker attendants do not accept Turkish lira.
Day:185, Words:185
The Danish train system is quite smart as long as you are prepared. Seats must be pre-booked, otherwise the long journey will resemble a silent standing ovation. The carriages are also divided into bicycle friendly, family friendly and quiet carriages, which are really quite unfriendly. All of the carriages are clean and comfy and provide good service with internet connection, coffee and newspapers.
In fact as I write this now, the sun is setting over the farming, flat landscape, which is delightfully decorated with a smattering of tall, handsome, white wind turbines...
As for Legoland, the Danes really know how to do a good theme park. There wasn't a hint of Californian tourism arrogance, just good entertainment for the entire family and enough toilets and eating opportunities to host an Olympic games.
Well done Billund!
Monday, 2 July 2012
Day:184, Words:184
The Øksfjordians reached their receptionless hotel and followed the instructions as per email. Coming from a village, where doors were rarely locked and where crime was something that happened elsewhere, the contrast to downtown Copenhagen could not have been greater. Alcatraz was an open gate compared to this hotel. Codes were requested at corner and we opened more doors than an elevator attendant.
After a pleasant night in a...shall we say 'cosy' room, the Øksfjordians enjoyed the canals, the castles and the festive atmosphere. Denmark, it appears, is a more relaxed, more open and more drunk version of Norway. Certainly the alcohol laws are more tolerant and dare I say it, more 'realistic', but it did feel odd to purchase a bottle of sav blanc from the 7 eleven.
Perhaps that is why they all ride bikes...
Sunday, 1 July 2012
Day:183, Words:183
Tromsø itself has developed into a popular destination for international tourists. Nicknamed 'Paris of the North', Tromsø now offers world class food, festivals, coffee and tourism services. Today, the mercury nudged 20 degrees, sending some to Tromsø's local 'beach'. The splashing fun in the shallows was short lived as the rain came tumbling down, creating a semi tropical environment, if only for a short while.
Over the next few weeks 'A Northern Exposure' will be following the traveling Øksfjordians and their journeys into the mysterious south. Will they cope outside the haven of their serene and safe arctic village?
First stop is the gorgeous city of Copenhagen .
Stay tuned...